Georgia (the former soviet territory, no relation to ATL) claims it was bombed by Putin. This comes about a month after I referred to him as a "psycho" at field day. In the past five years he has been implicated in ordering the execution of Russian hostages, slipping a former KGB agent a Mickey Finn containing Pulonium 210, and now dropping a warhead on his neighbors.
I would say we have to do something about this guy, but I think he's too crazy for even the Retarded Cowboy to deal with (my apologies for using the word "retarded"). Sorry, I believe the president is retarded with capital "W".
The last time I thought we had to deal with an aggressive foreign country was the Taliban in Afghanistan, when they were destroying the ancient religious statues and shaving foreigners' heads for wearing shorts. Now the NFL is missing a hero who story has been twisted and his legacy will always about a theoretical cover-up and not about his personal sacrifice for America.
If I were Georgia's president, I think I would hire official food tasters, like in the movies about the crusader kings. Every once in a while, someone rises to power somewhere in the world who is just crazy enough to start a war on impulse. Since the advent of the A-bomb, we have figured out that not even the state of the art "duck and cover" defense works against a nuclear strike.
My advice to Georgia is give the unexploded missile back to Putin very nicely, insist he dropped it by accident, and tell him you heard that crazy Kazakhstani journalist Borat telling everyone that Putin's washed up.
I would also like to apologize to Putin personally for calling him a psycho, I meant it in the nicest of terms and I know it can be misinterpreted when taken out of context.
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